Saturday, October 20, 2007

What the Hell of the Moment


What the hell is up with smokers on the move; Those people that walk and smoke at the same time.


I'm not one of those people that walks up to smokers and tells them to quit; unless your names are Fred and Liz. If you want to die a horrible death with the added bonus of bad skin and teeth, that is on you. Puff away, my friend. Alls I'm saying is, stay in one frigging spot while you smoke.


My mother has a tendency of making her rounds through the apartment with a lit cigarette. All the damned smoke makes it look like she's in Michael Jackson's "Thriller" video. Mom, stay in one room. No one wants the scent of Eau de Nicotine in the house. My mother's poetic response would be, "Shut the f--k up Cory."


The outdoors isn't any better either.


Hey smoker in front of me! Yeah, you. I know this might surprise you, but when you go outside there is something called wind. And, you see, wind is funny, because it takes things like the smoke from your cancer-stick, and moves it around so that other people who aren't smoking have to breathe in the poisonous air that just spewed forth from your yellow-teeth infested pie-hole. So, pick a damned corner, turn your face away from the general public, and smoke your cigarette in peace. Thank you.

Wednesday, October 17, 2007

The Wonderful World of Disney

Walt Disney World needs to stop making up shit to celebrate. Every year it's a a new celebration.


Millions of people visit Disney World/Land every year. It's a wonderland of joy and happiness. Apparently if you win the Super Bowl you get the sudden urge to go there. We get it.

You don't need to sell it any more. How many f--king celebrations are there? The next thing you know we're going to be celebrating Mickey's first colonoscopy and Minnie's first PAP.